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#1014139 - 07/07/18 03:08 AM An R and Two Ds  
Joined: Sep 2003
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Rinkydink Offline
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Rinkydink  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,935
Central Arkansas
Life is unpredictable.

I just retired from AT&T with 41+ years June 27th.

My father-in-law died earlier this week @ 89 years young. Ugly 4 years of the big C.
Today my wife announces she wants a divorce. I am 62 and like everyone we’ve had our ups and downs but just wow. The thought of having to go into debt on a home (ours is paid for) is daunting to say the least.

I’m not looking for sympathy or divorce advice, just venting I guess. Going to have to get a new job to get a mortgage....yikes. Hold the ones you love close my friends.

Cover me, I’m going in.


17-1200RT

If you mix vodka, orange juice and milk of magnesia... Do you get a Phillips screwdriver?


Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.


Linc Gurley

#1014141 - 07/07/18 10:55 AM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: Rinkydink]  
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 7,393
Bud Online
95% of an RT
Bud  Online
95% of an RT
Member

Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 7,393
Southern Illinois
That is a lot of change at one time. Wishing you the best going forward.


95% of an RT.

I haven't had too many Beemers, I just don't have enough time.
#1014150 - 07/07/18 01:24 PM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: Rinkydink]  
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 9,725
Marty Hill Offline
The Energiser Bunny
Marty Hill  Offline
The Energiser Bunny
Member

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 9,725
Atlanta, Ga.
Wishing you all the best going fwd, as Bud said.


Marty
49 states/32 countries/3 continents

700GS/white...old age moto

WWMHD...ride till you can't

Semper Paratus
#1014170 - 07/08/18 12:29 AM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: Rinkydink]  
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,332
longjohn Offline
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longjohn  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,332
lax
So she'll get half of your retirement?


John

2005 R1200RT 3.8k 31k 71k and rising
1990 PC 800 (dead) 100+k
1979 Yamaha XS750F (sold) 79k
Large avatar

#1014175 - 07/08/18 03:27 AM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: longjohn]  
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,935
Rinkydink Offline
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Rinkydink  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,935
Central Arkansas
I don’t know yet...probably.


17-1200RT

If you mix vodka, orange juice and milk of magnesia... Do you get a Phillips screwdriver?


Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.


Linc Gurley

#1014210 - 07/09/18 02:44 AM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: Rinkydink]  
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,556
MikeRC Offline
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MikeRC  Offline
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,556
Alberta Canada
Linc:

Lots of people have been through this and support from friends and family is more important than you can imagine.

Seek legal advice early, the littlest things you decide to do can be misinterpreted by either the ex or the courts. A consultation with a family lawyer who does collaborative law or mediation is about as non-threatening as you can get and you can learn a lot in just one hour. Simple questions like "Where do I go?". "What do I do with joint accounts?" "What do I have to do right now and what can wait for a month or two?" "What can I expect from her?"

Try to keep talking with her, but if that door is closed you need to make some hard decisions.

Best wishes.

Mike Cassidy


2013 R1200GSW
2002 Silver R1150RT (gone)
2004 Kawasaki KLX 400 SR

I wish I could be 1/4 the rider this bike deserves.
#1014217 - 07/09/18 11:23 AM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: Rinkydink]  
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 858
Sonor Offline
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Sonor  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 858
Orange County, NC
I was lucky with my first wife. We both knew it wasn't right for us and parted friends. Very rare indeed. I got a great second wife and life is good. All of that said, there is hope for better and hang on to that. All the best with both the emotional side (a friend gone) and the mechanics of who gets what.


aka "Z-Man"
R1200RT 05
"If cagers can do something stupid, they will."
#1014219 - 07/09/18 12:15 PM Re: An R and Two Ds [Re: Sonor]  
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 1,381
Patallaire Online
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Patallaire  Online
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 1,381
Buffalo,NY, USA
Whatever this is worth to you, first try to keep it together, seek counseling with her, if that isn't going to work, take a hard line on your emotions. They will be there but in the end it is going to be all about the money! So get that fact in your head and figure out what you are worth, what half of it is, whether half is the house or half is the pension plan or the accumulations. Just get to that number quickly. The attorneys will cost to keep the fight going which in the end will all be about the money. So cut your losses and move on. Sounds cold, but I have dealt with enough of these to recognize the outcome. Good luck.


Pat Allaire
99RT Tundra Green
www.AllaireFinancial.Com
Allaire Financial Strategies
Buffalo, NY

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